Through Evangelist Bill Vanderbush's years of ministry, he has seen many people saved, healed and delivered. But when his own father didn't receive healing after a stroke, it sent him into a spiritual battle unlike anything he had experienced before.
"I knew God can do anything. And I knew He would. ... I was sold on those two things. ... I prayed. I fasted. I did everything I could think of to do to twist God's arm to what I felt was in His heart to do," Vanderbush tells host Chris Mikkelson on the Salvation Today podcast on the Charisma Podcast Network. "Now, I believe Jesus paid for healing on the cross. Absolutely. I believe it's totally in the atonement. It's been paid for. Why we don't see it manifest all the time?—still working on those issues. I don't have an answer for that.
"But I did everything that I could think of to do spiritually to try to get God to move, and then I did everything I could think of to do rebelliously. It's like if you can't get your dad's attention by doing the good things, what about if you get his attention by completely neglecting your relationship with Him? ... It led me into the hardest season of life that I've ever been in my entire life. And I began to experience the very thing that I was preaching against, which was offense at God. I dived headlong into it."
During that difficult season, Vanderbush says, "I couldn't find peace. ... I heard a minister that I love say, 'In order to access the peace that passes understanding, you got to give up your right to understand.' I just broke sweat before God, repented before God [for] my attitude, my heart, all the actions that I was doing that I knew hurt His heart."
To hear more of Vanderbush's story of how God's Father heart brought him true peace and back into His calling, listen to the entire podcast here.
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