God put Adam and Eve in a perfect environment, in a perfect economy, with perfect health and perfect weather. Everything was looking good, but the devil showed up. He came as a serpent and tempted Adam and Eve to sin. They ate the fruit, and God came walking through the garden looking for them. They thought, Oh my goodness, we're stark naked in the middle of the interstate. We need to hide!
God knew where they were, and He asked them, "What have you done? Did you eat the fruit I commanded you not to eat?"
This moment is where all marital conflict started.
The first thing Adam said was, "Well, it's the woman you gave me. Me and you, God, we had it made, but ever since she came into my life, things have been going downhill."
God looked at Eve and said, "What do you have to say?"
And she said, "Well, it wasn't me, it was the snake. I told you I didn't like snakes. It was all the snake's fault!"
This is exactly what happens in most marriage counseling appointments. Both spouses want to blame somebody else. "If it weren't for the government..." "If it weren't for my boss..." "If it weren't for my spouse..." "If it weren't for my kids..." "If it weren't for your parents..." "If it weren't for the weather, I'd be fine." The sin nature in all of us always wants to blame somebody else.
The real reason our marriages are struggling is because of the curse of sin in our flesh. Our flesh is no good. It's selfish. It prefers to get its own way and blame everyone else for our problems.
We have to realize in a marriage, we'll always need to follow God and His Word. God never intended for there to be a marriage on this planet over which He wasn't Lord. His Word is filled with instructions on how to build a great relationship together.
The best way to see your marriage succeed is to get God in the middle of it.
Joe McGee is the author of You Don't Find a Great Marriage, You Build One, which is based on his Marriage Building 101 seminar that he has led for 25 years in churches across the country.
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