Social media has a lot of benefits and pitfalls, especially when it comes to how your spouse feels about your “friends” and “followers.” Here are some tips about how to go about your posts and your tweets:
1. Never get defensive. If you need to defend it, you are probably in the wrong. Don’t defend a virtual friend you never see over your spouse!
2. Unfriend old girl/boyfriends. Sure, they might be your ex, but you now have access to their every move. Do you really need to know what they're up to? Men, do you really need to see pictures of them in a bikini? Don’t ask your spouse if “it’s cool” for you to be friends with them, either.
3. Relationship status. If you’re married, you better have it marked that you're married. Another cool way to make it known is in your pictures that you post, and you can write something good about your spouse or marriage once in a while. This should help keep the “lookers” away.
4. Be cool with a page review. If your spouse has feelings of distrust and wants to look through your social media, let it happen. Don’t lose or break the trust in your marriage over something as meaningless as your status updates.
5. Don’t do it at all. I know a lot of couples that don’t use social media at all, and they have great marriages. Of course, we won't say anything about their overall tech knowledge, but again, this is your marriage, and it should be very important to you! Talk it over with your spouse and find out if this would be the best thing to do.
6. Share happy photos. Have a great photo of the two of you? Put it up on your wall or keep it as your cover. Have a picture of your child or children? Throw that up on your wall every now and then. You should want to put out a positive message to the people that see you and follow you.
7. No messaging with the opposite sex. Early in my marriage, I started catching up with some women I knew from years ago. I didn’t think it was a big deal at the time, until my wife started asking what I was doing. It was a big deal to her, and it should be a big deal to you! Again, don’t unnecessarily put yourself in bad situations. Keep the private messages for your spouse.
8. Combine your pages. I can’t say I have done this personally with my spouse, but this might be a great way to stay connected with friends and family and not have to worry about who or what you're doing. This would also send a positive message about your marriage!
9. Don’t share issues! What do I mean? Don’t share issues that you are having in your marriage on social media and then let your spouse find out. Marriage is all about great communication skills, and with our growing culture of texting and updates, we are losing the one-on-one deep talks. Go to your spouse first, and work out whatever issues you are having. Don’t seek advice from your buddy whom you haven’t seen in 10 years.
10. Share funny things with each other. I love to send my wife a funny picture, interesting message or new story on her wall. Not only does this show everyone that the two of you have great connecting skills, but it shows others that your marriage is strong and happy.
And that was only 10 ways! Share some ways you and your spouse handle the social media world.
Manturity is a blog built on establishing spiritual maturity in today's man. The goal is to assist men in building better marriages, help men in grow in maturity and explore different aspects of manhood. Manturity.com features new weekly blog posts, daily social media updates and a powerful resources page. Stay up to date with the Manturity blog communities on Facebook and Twitter.
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