If you have a partner who has confessed an affair, is willing to receive counseling and is determined to change, work with him or her and believe God for reconciliation. Affairs are usually symptomatic of deeper issues that need to be resolved, and restoration of the marriage will require the participation of both spouses. Here are some steps to take to begin the process:

1. Cease all contact with the person outside the marriage who was involved in the affair.
2. Express feelings related to the crisis.
3. Identify what made you vulnerable to an affair.
4. Figure out what the affair meant. Did you lose your spiritual grounding or want to hurt your partner? Are you afraid of intimacy, or is there some other reason for it occurring?
5. Forgive. Unforgiveness leads to bitterness and a host of physical and psychological problems.
6. Build caring moments into the relationship again.
7. Move toward reconciliation. Restore trust by trustworthy behavior and assurance. Don't live in fear of a recurrence. Determine to do things God's way.
8. Get counseling that incorporates the Word, prayer and leading of the Holy Spirit. There may be multiple wounds to be healed.
9. Don't live in continual condemnation after trust and true repentance have been established.
10. Believe God can restore what was broken and lost. This is His business. Your past is not a prologue to your future in God.