I do trust Him even though at times I don't understand what He is allowing or doing or not doing at all.
I do trust Him even when I desperately want Him to fix things for us, and His timing is very slow in my estimation.
I do trust Him even when I feel like I can't bear one more decision...one more heartache...one more difficulty...one more broken anything.
I do trust Him when I can't provide for my children as I'd like to.
I do trust Him when things don't go the way I thought they would...and my way seems so much better.
I do trust Him that He is leading, even though I haven't gotten any lightning bolts with memos attached...no GPS from God...no heavenly updates on the plan.
I do trust that He loves my children and is working in their lives.
I do trust that He will always love me.
Wow! That really helped. Listing all those things...that gives me some perspective. It is much easier to rest in that trust when I remind myself of it.
Actually the best thing was reminding myself of the object of my trust...
Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths (Prov. 3:5-6).
So the decisions I need to make...particularly the biggest one...I will pray, seek Scripture, seek some counsel...but I'm going to trust that my Father has prepared me to make wise decisions. I'm going to trust that He will work in my life whatever I decide. I'm going to trust that I cannot step outside of His sovereignty.
Now THAT gives me some peace.
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid (John 14:27).
Sue Birdseye is an author and single mom of five kids that range in age from 4 to 17. Her book, When Happily Ever After Shatters (Tyndale House), is in bookstores. This is adapted from her blog, uptomytoes.com
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