This is Part 3 of a three-part series on whether Christians can be gay. (Check out Part 1 here and Part 2 here.)
7. Some people are definitely more susceptible to homosexuality than others (proclivity vs. practice).
Some individuals are “wired” more toward these artistic areas: music, singing, dance, poetry, cooking, clothing design, hairstyling and painting as opposed to football, baseball, basketball, hunting, wrestling and other athletics. These differences are healthy and make for diversity in the human family. Yet if a dad who enjoys contact sports ridicules a son who doesn’t, or if a parent doesn’t affirm a daughter’s femininity, a child can feel misunderstood and rejected and most vulnerable to outside, negative influences.
One of my sons was more athletic, the other more artistic. I tried to affirm their bent with unconditional love, while helping both develop their masculinity. Today my oldest son is about to be married and is a type A leader running aggressive, political campaigns. My younger son has been married for over a decade, has two adopted sons and is the pastor of a thriving church.
8. There is a difference between desire and deed.
Many good people lay in their beds wrestling with feelings and fantasies regarding homosexuality. Just because someone is tempted in an area does not mean they are guilty of sexual misconduct. As they say, “You can’t stop birds flying around your head, but you can stop them from building a nest in your hair!”
Also, just because someone has homosexual desires and states they don’t “feel” there’s anything wrong with acting upon them, that doesn’t make it right. Objective standards, not subjective feelings, have to govern our lives, or else people can justify all kinds of behavior—such as pedophilia, rape or child molestation.
The Brown University student health plan is now going to cover sex changes (called
"gender reassignment") if a girl wants to morph into a male or vice versa! Scriptural standards, not experience or feelings, must be our guide, or the moral confusion will only get worse.
9. God loves all people, and it is His plan to see us change to fulfill our destiny.
Jesus Christ welcomed and accepted everyone but called them to change unrighteous lifestyles—the adulteress, the multi-lover Samaritan, the corrupt tax collectors. He said, “Go and sin no more!” And when they obeyed, they discovered the same life of freedom, peace and joy available to us today!
10. Homosexual behavior can be changed, as evidenced by multitudes throughout America and in the Bible.
I personally know a woman who left a lesbian lifestyle after 42 years and a male former homosexual who today is married with numerous children. Organizations helping homosexuals find freedom through compassionate counseling are filled with the testimonies of thousands of real people who really have changed. Consider also high-profile celebrities who’ve done likewise:
- Actress Anne Heche left her homosexual partnership with Ellen DeGeneres to marry a man, as did singer Sinead O’Connor when she married Nick Sommerlad.
- Three-time MVP in the WNBA and two-time gold medalist Sheryl Swoopes actually did it in reverse! She was married with an 8-year-old when she decided to divorce her husband for her “lover,” Alisa Scott.
Going from “straight to gay” or “gay to straight” undermines the theory that sexual orientation is inherited and unchangeable. You might call this “inconvenient truth.” California has even passed a law forbidding anyone to counsel anyone until age 18 that change is possible!
In light of all we’ve examined, it should be clear to anyone who calls, writes or asks about the issues we’ve discussed that there really are answers to the legitimate questions being asked. Maybe the reader believed some of the myths and misinformation circulating in our culture, believing them to be fact. But as John Keynes, the British economist who influenced the economic policies of many governments, used to say, “When facts change, I change my mind! What do you do?”
Larry Tomczak is the apostolic leader and evangelist with Larry Tomczak Ministries www.larrytomczak.com. He is the author of six books, including Divine Appointments (Destiny Image).